Thursday, May 17th - The Best is Yet to Come

Steve picked up his final paperwork yesterday. He said he felt a little emotional while waiting for the clerk to prepare the documents. He was sitting alone, looking around him, watching soldiers pass by, and it hit him that his army career is really over. While he's not second-guessing his choice to retire, he's finding it hard to grasp that that part of his life is done. I wish I could say or do something to make him feel more joyous, but I think he's got to work through all these feelings on his own. Soldiering truly was a way of life for him (and me). I'm going to miss seeing him in uniform.

I made reservations for dinner at Pike's Waterfront Lodge to celebrate. We both enjoyed our meal immensely, and talked a lot about our upcoming trips. When we came home, we enjoyed champagne and toasted our future. We officially start the next chapter of our life now.

"I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today."
~ William Allen White ~

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."
~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

Thank you to all of you who sent congratulations on Steve's retirement. It's hard for both of us to believe it's over. We're still very much a part of the big military family. We have many friends who are still serving or are the family of those serving. Over the years, we have met many incredible people because of our life in the military. We have even appreciated the moving every three years. Those moves gave us the opportunity to explore new places and meet new people.

The military lifestyle isn't easy. The separations are never easy. The long hours and stress of the military member almost always causes a ripple effect in the family. Kids get transferred from school to school. Some get transferred - and are expected to adapt and adjust - at critical points in their school years. The guilt we feel as parents can be overwhelming sometimes. We learn to say goodbye to those we've come to love; those who have become family to us. It's a cycle that repeats over and over again.

But I wouldn't have it any other way. I have had so many incredible experiences over the last 15 years of marriage to my soldier. If I wouldn't have become a military spouse, I'd probably still be living in Philadelphia, complaining about the traffic and smog and congestion.

My travels wouldn't have taken me to NC or GA or the parts of FL outside of Disneyworld or Clearwater Beach. And if I would have found a way to come to AK, it would have been for too short a time to really appreciate this wonderful state.

I doubt I would have ever gone camping - ever. Until I met Steve, I never slept in a tent. A road trip for me and the kids was driving 2 hours to Cape May, NJ. Since marrying Steve, we learned that road trips meant packing the tent and driving cross country, stopping at little state parks off the beaten path, rather than commercialized campgrounds. We learned that vacations don't have to be mandated by where the hotels are. We learned that the US is a beautiful country that doesn't end in our backyard.

There has been so much joy brought into our life by living a military lifestyle. I do believe my sons benefited greatly, even though there were times when they had to be led kicking and screaming to the next duty station.

There has been stress and heartache too. It's tough to be a single mom, even when you're married. It's tough to work outside the home, and run the entire show within the home, because your soldier is out in the field for two weeks, or away training for a month, or off to war for a year... or more. It's tough to celebrate birthdays and anniversaries without your mate. It's aggravating when everything that could go wrong, does - and it's while your husband is away. It's hard to get used to having him back again - especially when he thinks he can just jump right into being the one 'in charge'. So many adjustments...

And then there's the daily thrill of seeing your soldier put on his camouflage uniform and lace up his boots and head off to work in the morning. The way his uniform feels against your face when he pulls you in tight for a hug. The uniform is stiff and pressed, but the man beneath is warm and soft... and so protective of his family. Knowing that you are married to a man who would take on the world with no hesitation, and defend his friends and family - and country - to the end. You feel so very proud.

We are both looking forward to this next chapter in our life, but it's going to be a long time before we cease feeling like a military family. You can take away the uniform, but you can't take away the soldier. That strong, patriotic, protector will always be there. And I'm happy to spend the rest of my life with him.

On Tuesday, I took Sedona with me when I met my friend Abby for breakfast at the Cookie Jar. Sedona was a good girl and waited for me in the car, even though we ate slow and chit-chatted for more than an hour. It was nice to spend some time with Abby before her life gets hectic (she's got kids involved with summer sports).

Then I drove to Creamers Field so Sedona and I could get some exercise. We walked along the wetlands trail and I took photos of the different birds I saw there. The sun was high in the sky, which doesn't result in good photos (too bright and stark), but at least I shot some photos of Northern Shovelers (ducks), a Lesser Yellowlegs, a Bonaparte Gull, a Downy Woodpecker, and a Rock Dove (pigeon). Sedona chased squirrels and then decided to go swimming in the murky marsh water. She sure was a smelly dog! Thank goodness the smell went away as she dried.

I emailed the folks at the local bird observatory. I told them about our experience with the sandhill cranes on the way to Denali. I asked why there were only about 30-40 cranes in the fields. Where did the others go?

I learned that the birds that stop at Creamers in the early summer migration are mostly bachelor males or young adults. Once in a while a pair will stop and breed here, but that's a rarity. The large number I saw flying overhead? They'll keep on flying until they reach their breeding grounds further north. Some even fly as far as Siberia! In August, however, the bulk of them will stop here on their way south for the winter. The breeding is over with by then and they're just looking for a place to rest and eat. I learned something new.

Yellowlegs	Shovelers	Bonaparte Gull	Downy Woodpecker
Northern Shoveler Pair	Rock Dove (Rock Pigeon)	Willow catkins gone to seed	If I keep a green bough in my heart, the singing bird will come. Chinese Proverb

At Creamers Field there are several mist nets hung in the trees. Info found online: Mist nets are used by ornithologists to capture wild birds for banding or other research projects. The mesh net is typically made of nylon and resembles an oversized volleyball net. When properly deployed, the nets are virtually invisible. The grid size of the mesh netting varies according to the size of the avian species targeted for capture. If used by trained personnel, mist netting is an efficient method of capturing wild birds in flight while posing minimal risk of incidental injury to entrapped birds. In the United States, federal and state permits are required to capture wild birds with mist nets. The mist net consists of two poles with the net strung between them.

A bird caught in a mist net will struggle, entangling itself further, so the net must be checked often and the bird removed promptly. Disentangling a bird from a mist net can be difficult and must be done carefully by trained personnel. If a bird is heavily tangled the mist net should be cut to avoid injuring the bird.

Creamers Field has several mist netting demonstrations throughout the year. I think it would be a neat thing to attend.

From Creamers, I ran many errands - one of which was to pick up two new batteries for my camera. I have seven now. I needed the new batteries. Four of the five I already have are from prior cameras (thank goodness they're the same size!), but they just don't hold a good charge any longer. I don't want to run into any problems when we're in Katmai. I also picked up some more blank tapes for our digital video camera to cover this summer's adventures. By the time Sedona and I got home, Steve was home from taking care of 'truck stuff' and filling gas cans so we don't have to buy gas on the Parks Highway ($3.40/gallon) when we head out on Saturday.

On Tuesday night, Steve and I met a few friends at the Captain Bartlett Inn. I met these folks online through the Yahoo 360 blog community. It was nice to finally meet them in person. "Big Kev" (Kevin) owns Alaska Transfer and Design here in Fairbanks. He's in his late 30s, plays softball and basketball, loves road trips and Alaska. His family moved here when he was 10 years old.

"Alaska Rose" (Eddie - nickname for Edwina) is a beautiful woman of *cough* years. She looks much younger than her birth certificate says; must be the fresh Alaska air! Eddie was born and raised in Palmer, but now lives in Two Rivers with her husband and youngest son (who will graduate high school this year), and her three horses.

"Phantom" (Laurie) is from Columbus OH, where she works at the Columbus Zoo. She's been to AK several times, and wants to move here. She keeps her eye on the employment websites in the hope that she'll someday find a position here that will allow her to pack up her life and live her dream.

It was a very fun evening, filled with hours of laughter. I laughed so hard at times that I cried. I hope we can do it again sometime. Steve enjoyed himself too. Now he knows that I have friends who don't just live in my computer.

Today, Steve and I will be planning our camping menu and then going to the commissary for groceries. We try to keep things simple when we're on the road. Neither of us is particularly fond of cooking when we're camping, and we're thankful for those box meals that have all the ingredients included. They may not be the most health-conscious choices, but they're quick and easy, and don't involve a lot of dishes. Cereal, sandwich fixins and snacks (lots of fruit too) will round out our list.

We'll be spending a night in Palmer to break up the drive to Homer. We'll spend three nights in Homer and then make our way back to Fairbanks, stopping in Ninilchik for two nights, and then Talkeetna for a night. Steve's got two fishing charters booked, and I'll spend those days exploring the local area. I'm hoping to meet up with my friend Jody in either Homer or Soldotna.

The weather doesn't look so nice for that area in the upcoming week. Storms are expected, with lots of clouds. I guess rain gear will be in order. I don't mind overcast days too much. Some of the best photos are taken when the light is muted.

I'll be taking my laptop, and I think some of the campgrounds have WiFi, but I don't know if I'll have time to update this journal. In that case, you won't hear from me until after the 26th.

Until next time...